claudetools/projects/radio-show/audio-processor/training-data/transcripts/2011-09-10-hr1/transcript.txt

From my heart and from my hand, why don't people understand my intentions?
Computer running slow?
Boing!
Caught a virus?
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Does your computer seem to have a life of its own?
Malfunction.
Me getting good.
The computer guru is here.
My God, you're here!
Call in now.
751-1041.
That's 751-1041.
Now, it's Mike Swanson, your computer guru.
On 104.1 The Truth.
I'm in for a juice-ass news talk, FM.
Hello and welcome to the Computer Guru Show.
My name's Mike.
Here to deal with your technology needs and treat you like a real person in the process.
Today is September 10th, 2011.
Now, I was thinking back on the way down here.
I was thinking, you know, my mom used to tell me that, you know, you always remembered where you were when Kennedy was shot.
Right.
Or when man landed on the moon.
Right.
These are moments, landmark moments.
Where you remember for the rest of your life everything about that moment when you heard about it.
Okay.
So I was thinking about, where was I when I heard about September 11th, 2001?
Right.
And I was sitting at the left turn light at Campbell and Speedway on my way to work.
And my dad called me and he said, are you near a TV?
You should, you know, somebody flew a plane into a building.
And, you know, my dad and I are big aviation buffs, right?
We always talk.
We talk about airplanes and such.
And we thought, at least initially, at the time that he called me, it was similar to when, you know, there was a long time ago, there was a plane that crashed in the Empire State Building.
So we thought, well, wow, how do you manage to do something like that?
Right, right.
And so by the time I got to work, you know, everybody's sitting in front of a TV.
And that's when the second tower got hit.
Right.
And so it was suddenly a very different feeling for me.
Because initially it was just, this is just tragic that somebody would, you know, inadvertently fly into a building like that.
And that's terrible for all the people that lost their lives.
But then to, then once you knew that something was going on, that there was something else going on, that the mood changed dramatically.
And I remember going outside and it was just so silent.
And there was no cars.
There was no, definitely no planes.
You know, everything was just.
Shut down.
And it was a very surreal day for me.
You know, and watching that.
And I'm sure for everyone.
You know, to be able to watch that and just.
It's just amazing.
And so my tribute, at least to the 10th anniversary of the September 11th, is to remind people that, you know, we are a great country.
And we are a wonderful people.
And there may be, you know, there are things that we don't do right on a global scale.
There may be things where we don't make the best decisions.
But we are fantastic people.
And we should never forget to honor the people that have fought and died for us and to keep us safe.
And just to remember that, you know, in spite of tragedy, we are what makes America great.
You know, each and every one of us.
We are the ones that continue to go on.
That smile.
That remember.
Endure through it all.
Yeah.
Just remember that, you know, you are the greatness.
And make sure that whatever you do on a daily basis is being more of that.
Right?
Every day I live my life trying to be a better person than I was yesterday.
Right.
And so I just urge people to do that in their own lives as far as, you know, if you want to have a wonderful life.
Right.
And even though my life isn't, you know, isn't all daffodils, right, you know, you know, I'm happy with who I am because I work very hard to make sure that I am better than I was yesterday.
Right.
Yeah.
And then I was 10 years ago, I was full of anger and resentment and rage about tomorrow.
And, you know, it's now I look at it very differently.
You know, I've had the opportunity to mature a little over the last 10 years and to say, well.
This is just an opportunity for us to be better.
So please observe your September 11th, you know, whatever you're doing for this day.
I urge you to reflect back on what you were 10 years ago.
And I hope that you're a better person today, not simply because of it, just as a reminder of that.
Absolutely.
Go out and do something for the community tomorrow.
You know, go out there and, you know, just show your support a little bit, you know.
Or just, you know.
Thank an officer or a fireman that, you know, because these are the guys that they're the heroes of September 11th.
So, you know, I mean, I was in the Army, but I'm not a hero of September 11th by no means.
These firefighters and cops and all these guys, even though they weren't over in New York, maybe.
First responders are the ones that have to live with this on a daily basis, and especially right now.
Absolutely.
You think about what they're doing right now in New York.
I mean, that place is on lockdown.
But, you know, thank you very much to everyone in the community that is first responder or has anything to do.
With keeping us safe.
Absolutely.
And if you just want to find something else to do, for you to do your good deed for the day tomorrow,
there are actually lots of things that are going on.
One of our listeners, they're actually doing a blood drive tomorrow from noon to 4.
It's a September 11th blood drive.
It's going to be at 250 West Speedway Boulevard.
The people that are doing it is the United Blood Services Muslims for Life.
And this is a Muslim mosque that is doing this.
So I think that's very cool that they're doing a blood drive.
And anybody who gives blood will be put in for a $1,000 shopping spree with Schmidt Jewelers.
So little things like that, I know you shouldn't do it just for the shopping spree.
You should do it because you want to do it.
So you want to give some blood, give back to the community, people who need it.
That's an option for you to do that.
It would be great.
And the blood bank is always looking for people to give up the goods.
Absolutely.
It's always in need.
So if you have the opportunity, go down and check them out tomorrow.
All right.






Well, yes.
I'm done being somber.
Oh, okay.
All right.
We've got to end the somberness here because, you know, that's not what this show is about.
It's not supposed to be sad and reflective.
Let's go ahead and take a call here.
Oh, Lionel, how are you doing?
I'm sorry, who?
Me?
Yes.
I didn't hear my name.
Oh, I didn't hit the button properly, I guess.
Well, there you go.
Anyway, your opening comments were spot on.
I appreciate it.
Oh, thank you.
I'm calling about smartphone security.
Have you guys downloaded?
Checked out any of the mobile Droid apps that are available on the market like My Lookout or the AVG one or any of those?
I use the Lookout mobile security on my phone.
And that's the one that I like.
And to me, it seems to do the job just fine.
It doesn't slow down your phone at all very much?
Not that I can notice.
Okay.
And it seems to do most of its stuff only at when you access a certain application or when you install the application.
or when you first start up the phone.
So everything in between, it's not doing much.
Right, and you're definitely pleased with it then.
It works for me.
And I like it because it gives me the opportunity to do the remote wipe,
the location of my phone if I lose it.
Right.
Which is the primary reason I installed the application in the first place.
Butterfingers, huh?
Well, you know, I tend to leave things.
Yeah, right.
Laptops and phones and my keys everywhere.
There you go.
Because it turns the phone on.
Right, it turns the phone on like today.
So, yes, I put that on there mainly because I wanted something to keep track of the phone.
Right, right.
And as a side note, it does, you know, the privacy screening
and the basic antivirus on the phone as well, which is kind of nice.
All right, very good.
Thanks for the information.
No problem.
Thanks for the call.
I appreciate it.
If you'd like to be part of the show, 751-1041,
we'll see what we can do to help you out with whatever technology issues you may be having.
But, Raynal.
Yes.
Do you remember what we can get?
Because I see right now.
I'm Ray.
I'm a goody-go-money machine, but I do have some news.
Things I can talk about off the top of my head.
Yeah.
Hey, if you guys have an extra $40,000 laying around and you want to buy a pair of shoes,
I'm going to tell you what shoes you can buy because they're awesome.
Right.
So that's pretty cool.
And it goes to a charity.
I don't know who would buy $40,000 shoes, but I guess some people are.
Some people are.
1,500 people are, yeah, I guess.
So, yeah, that's cool.
And that money is going to a fundraiser for people with Parkinson's.
So you might be able to put the pieces together.
I'll tell you a little bit more about that here.
People are hacking cars now.
People are hacking cars, yeah.
I mean, they have to have physical touch with it, but they are hacking cars.
Yeah, that's not for long.
Pretty soon they'll be able to do it through ESPN.
People are getting viruses via speeding tickets.
That's awesome.
That is interesting.
We'll tell you a little more about that one as well.
And, of course, there's always the new thing.
You know, people are mooning Google TV.
Or not Google TV.
They're mooning Google street maps.
I didn't know that they were actually mooning.
Wasn't it just a full-on frontal?
Full Monty.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Full Monty.
So it has to be planned.
So that's out there.
I'll never get tired of those stories.
So what else we got going on?
Well, the other things that we're looking at is the droiding bionic.
Droid.
Droid bionic.
It came out this week.
Yes.
And they officially released the LTE in Tucson.
I know.
I got that email.
Very nice.
I don't know what I'm thinking about that just yet.
I had to get my hands on and play with it.
I'm going to get it first before I can decide.
Now, Crystal is out.
And we got Ross in here today.
Yes.
Ross is here.
And Ross is...
He doesn't remember how my show works.
He doesn't know the new stuff either.
And so we're just going to confuse him right now.
That's all right.
So let's go ahead and do an outro.
Let's get out of here.
We're going to go to a break real quick here.
This is the Computer Guru.
See?
See?
Yeah.
Got it.
He's going to get it.
By the end of the show, he's going to be a poor mixing expert for the Computer Guru.
Then we're going to lose him.
Yeah.
Then he's going to be gone for the week.
So, all right.
We're able to...
You're listening to the Computer Guru Show.
We'll be right back.
You good?
Mac or PC?
Desktop or laptop?
The Computer Guru.
We'll get your problem solved.
Call 751-1041 to talk with the Guru now.
On 104.1 The Truth.
Welcome back to the Computer Guru Show.
You know what we're doing today?
What?
3 o'clock.
What?
I'm doing another Windows Basics class.
Oh.
All right.
So, Windows 7.
Introduction to Windows 7.
So, if you're moving over from, you know, XP or Vista.
Mainly XP.
98.
I don't know.
If you're coming from 98...
You get your own class if you're coming from 98.
I actually had this gentleman come into the shop this week.
He had an old on a brick of a laptop.
And this thing, you could have hit somebody with it and knocked him out.
And it had Windows NT on it, man.
And I was like...
He's like...
Is this thing worth anything?
Like, depends on if you're a collector.
I mean...
If you're Indiana Jones, it might be worth something.
But other than that, no.
If you're Indiana Jones.
Nice.
So, we're doing another class today.
Yes.
It's a Windows 7 Basics.
Right.
Basically, we're going to teach you everything that you need to know about the stuff that's changed.
And if you're migrating from a previous version of Windows, we'll kind of teach you how to do that.
Nice.
Now, we know that there's no direct upgrade path from XP to 7.
But we can teach you how to get your stuff over there and make it so that it at least looks familiar to you.
And teach you about the new tools that are in it.
Because there's...
You know, one of the questions we get most often about Windows 7 is...
Well, all right.
I'm coming from XP, so I'm used to doing my defraggling.
Defrag.
And my other maintenance on a weekly or sometimes hourly basis.
What do I need to do now?
And the truth is, nothing.
It's all automatic in 7, which is kind of nice.
And there's just...
The biggest change overall is the searchability of 7.
Which is just pretty amazing.
So, if you want to attend the class, you can from 3 o'clock to 5 o'clock today.
It generally runs from, let's say, 3.15 to 7.
You know, just because I don't kick everybody out.
It's, you know, they continue to ask questions.
I continue to answer them until people get tired and leave.
Sometimes I could run on for hours.
Yeah.
So, it's $40.
Come on down.
We can teach you whatever you want to know.
If you want more information, you can call Shop 304-8300.
Or if you'd like to be part of this show,
call 751-1041.
We'll see what we can do to help you out with whatever technology is ailing you today.
So, let's talk...
I want to talk about these shoes real fast.
Really?
You're all about these shoes.
I'm all about these shoes.
These $40,000 shoes.
Well, actually, they're whatever their highest bid is.
But, so, I don't know if you guys remember Back to the Future.
Or I should say Back to the Future 2.
There, Marty McFly was wearing some really cool Nikes in there.
And, you know, they were lit up in colors.
And they adjusted to his feet and all that good stuff.
Out of lace.
Right.
Out of lace.
Exactly.
And it talked.
I like the jacket myself.
The jacket, yeah.
Dry cleans.
Well, no jacket yet.
But the shoes are available now.
So, these Nike shoes are only making 1,500 pair.
And they're being sold to the highest bidders.
eBay only.
Well, a majority...
A couple hundred are on eBay.
And they're doing other bids, too.
You know, in-person bids.
But all the proceeds...
This is what's cool about it.
So, let's say somebody buys one for $3,000, $7,000.
Like somebody just did recently.
Yeah.
$3,000, $7,000.
Well, somebody's going to match that.
The actual creator of Google is matching that.
Up to $50 million.
Up to $50 million.
So, it's pretty cool.
All the proceeds are going to Michael J. Fox's charity for Parkinson's disease.
Which is really cool.
He was on the Letterman Show.
It was the last night or the night before last.
I'm not sure.
And, you know, he talked about it.
And he looks like he's doing really good.
Even though he has Parkinson's and he can't really act as much anymore.
He's doing really good, it seems like.
But these shoes are really cool.
And they light up.
They even do the auto-adjust.
So, you know, you put them on your feet.
You push the button.
They automatically cinch up to your foot.
No, no, no.
The auto-lace is not in them.
No, no.
The band at the top.
It does.
Oh, the band at the top.
But the auto-lace is not in there.
The lace is not the lace.
But the band at the top does adjust automatically.
And they're rechargeable.
It's the first rechargeable shoe that Nike has made.
Yeah.
Now, I think they went about this all wrong.
I think...
Because the person who...
The people who made this movie big.
You know, us.
The people who watched it all the time.
Can never afford $40,000 shoes.
I think what Nike should have done...
Because, you know, it takes them $2 to make a shoe.
Okay, this shoe, probably $50 to make this shoe.
They should have, you know, charged $400 for the shoe.
So, at least the average person can buy it.
That's the reason the auto-lace doesn't work.
Is because they, you know, their sweatshop labor doesn't really...
They can't figure out how that works.
Well, you know, I think that would be really, really cool.
So, the average person, instead of making $1,500 of them, make $15 million of them.
And let everybody buy one if they want.
Just pay $400 for it.


No, no, no.
Because, first of all, it's...
No.
No?
No, it's not going to work that way.
Why?
You got to think about it.
They're trying to raise this money for a charity.
Right.
So, they're doing that on a limited basis.
The opening bid for the shoes is pretty low.
Right?
Yeah, but what is going to...
And they're saying that they're going to sell nearly all of them on eBay.
Right.
With all of the net proceeds going to the foundation for Michael J. Fox.
I guarantee there won't be none sold under $20,000.
I don't know.
I don't see it.
I don't see it.
I mean, you get all these diamonds.
I heard people who have too much money.
You can give me the hoverboard, and then we're talking.
Oh, I'm in.
I want the hoverboard.
I'm in on that one.
I've been waiting years for that.
Mattel still says they're not releasing it.
Bunch of jerks.
That's what I'm telling you.
They're just jerks.
That's all they are.
If you'd like to be part of the show, 751-1041.
Let's go ahead and talk to James.
Hey, James, how are you doing?
I'm good.
How are you?
I'm doing all right.
I still want the hoverboard.
I'm actually, now that I think about it, I'm really upset.
That back to the future, I don't have a DeLorean that flies, and I don't have a hoverboard at this point.
Well, it's not 2015 yet.
Do you think they're coming with that in four years in this economy?
Yeah, I bet you can have one.
So what's going on, James?
I have kind of an old computer that I'm kind of trying to still keep running.
It's an older Dell.
It has Windows XP on it.
Okay.
I'm talking like five years old, and it had like an 80 gig hard drive on it, which was completely full.
Right.
So I had a friend of mine that's an IT guy.
I bought a 500 gig hard drive, and he, I don't know if I'm using the right terms,
he re-imaged basically my old hard drive onto the 500 gig.
So he cloned it, right?
Yeah, he cloned it.
That's it.
Put it back in.
It worked absolutely perfect for like a month.
Right.
And then all of a sudden, super slow.
I'm talking like the mouse doesn't even move without jumping.
And I got it to the point where I could, I don't know what the utility is called,
but in control panel, you can look and see what the processor's doing.
Right.
And the processor is at 100% all the time.
Okay.
So you either have an infection or you have some type of software that's really, really unhappy.
Well, you know, I ran my, I started it safe mode and ran my virus protector on it.
It didn't come up anything.
What virus protector do you have?
It's PC tools.
Okay.
Now, here's the deal.
If you get an infection, and this is true of all the antiviruses, but I'm going to make a generalization.
It's kind of a blanket statement.
And I will say that it's probably 90% true, is that when you get a virus on your machine,
let's say you get an infection, and you have an antivirus on there,
basically that virus becomes invisible to the antivirus that's installed on the machine.
Oh, even if I update it?
Even if you update it.
Because one of the first things that the better infections do, if we rate them on a scale of quality,
is that they go in and neuter the antivirus.
It says,
It says, look, I'm not here anymore.
You don't see me.
It kind of waves its hands and said, you know, you're looking for somebody else.
Yeah, there's even some new antiviruses out there.
Yeah, I've fixed the antivirus.
There's some new viruses out there that actually uninstall your antivirus and reinstalls as the antivirus.
Right, reinstalls itself looking just like the antivirus, but it's actually not.
It's the actual virus.
So, do you know when you get that process?
Are you near the machine?
No.
Okay.
So, one thing you're going to look at.
Okay.
If you can get the process list to come back.
Step again, where you can see you're 100%.
You can sort them by processes going into the process tab instead of the performance tab.
And you can find out which process itself is holding down all of your processor.
And that will give you a clue as to what's going on with it as far as if you can give me the name of the process that's holding everything down.
I can probably tell you how to fix it up.
Oh, okay.
So, do that.
And do you have another machine around or is this the only machine you have?
No, I've got another one.
All right.
So, then send me an email from the working machine.
It's a radio at azcomputerguru.com.
And we'll see what we can do to help you out.
Radio at azcomputerguru.com.
Right.
Or if you get it done in the next hour and a half, you can call me back and tell me what it is.
Okay.
All right.
Awesome.
Thank you.
Thanks for the call, James.
I appreciate it.
All right.
So, they're hacking cars these days, are they?
I hear, yes.
They are hacking cars.
Currently, they actually have to have physical contact with the car.
They have to actually get into the cab of the car.
And, you know, it's not.
Far from now, they won't even have to do that, though.
Yeah.
And you thought all you had to worry about then was stealing your change at the car washer.
Yeah, right.
They're going to be hacking your car.
Well, I mean, you think about it.
There's some cars out there, some of these new fancy cars that connect to the Internet wherever they go,
like, let's say, the Leaf.
Right.
With a car like that that's constantly hooked up to the Internet, you don't have to have physical contact with it.
You just have to really have a really good hacker.
And once they get it figured out the first time, well, they're done for.
I don't know.
What could you do by hacking the Leaf?
Make it possible.



You can't make it prettier.
Careful now.
There's a couple all around in town.
They might be listening.
You can't make it uglier.
I guess you can make it to where, you know, the battery is constantly.
I don't know.
I have no idea.
I'm on vapor soon.
I have no idea what to do.
Start a Leaf fire.
A Leaf fire.
That's terrible.
No, I guess you can make it to where, you know, the car will open.
Yeah.
Something like that.
You can unlock the car.
I guess you could do something like that.
Hey, bud.
If you have an extra bathroom in your house that you want to rent out,
I'm going to tell you how you can do that here in a few minutes.
Fantastic.
Oh, that's awesome.
You're listening to The Computer Guru Show right here on 104.1 The Truth,
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Now.
Now.
Back to more of The Computer Guru.
On 104.1 The Truth, Tucson's News Talk FM.
You know, I've been telling people for a long time when they get a traffic ticket and you
get the email about it.
Ignore it.
You should be ignoring it.
And here is the reason why now.
Because before it was just because I disagree with the service method.
Right.
Right.
Now, it's because it's probably a virus.
Interesting.
It gives me a much more satisfactory reason to say.
You shouldn't open that email.
So now you get viruses from speeding tickets.
That's right.
I like it.
This is one of the downfalls of speeding.
You get a virus now.
Maybe it's the city's way of, you know.
We'll get you.
Yeah.
Fine.
You're going to pay that money regardless.
You know, it's not going to be to us.
It's going to be to somebody else to get the virus off.
Yeah.
We're going to get taxes from somebody else if you don't pay this parking ticket or speeding ticket.
Oh, man.
You know, speaking of speeding tickets.
So I'm assuming it's an attachment with an email.
Yeah.
They're attaching it to an email.
Okay.
And it's.
It's stupid.
But, yeah.
It's just another reason that.
That you shouldn't open those emails.
Yes.
If they didn't have traffic cameras.
Right.
You wouldn't get these viruses.
That's how I'm looking at it.
Okay.
You're blaming it.
Blame it on the traffic cameras.
Yeah.
I don't like the traffic cameras.
Me either.
I'll tell you why.
I was moving last week.
Right.
Right.
So I've got this truck that I borrowed from some listeners.
Right.
Right.
Thank you, Tom and Mary Ann.
You guys are awesome.
Excellent.
And.
With a big trailer at that.
With a big trailer on it.
Bigger little horse trailer.
I'm sitting at the light.
At.
At.
Broadway and Craycroft.
Right.
Right.
And.
So you've got the traffic camera there.
I'm first in line.
Green light comes along.
I start to move out into the intersection.
I get popped four times.
Flashed.
Really?
Yeah.
And I'm like.
What did I do wrong?
I'm doing like six miles an hour.
Because the light just turned green.
And I've got this giant trailer loaded up behind me.
Yeah.
So you get.
What?
You get one of our listeners a ticket?
I told them just, you know.
I told them.
I told them that if they get any traffic tickets, it's not them.
So they can safely discard them.
Right.
Because it's me driving.
But, you know, it's.
Those things are so irritating.
And here's the other thing that really bothers me about them.
And I'm just going to go on a little soapbox rant here.
All right.
Is that the speed limit is posted.
Right.
Right.
The speed limit is.
Let's give an example.
Forty.
Okay.
All right.
You're cruising down river.
You got a 40 mile an hour speed limit.
Mm-hmm.
That means that you have somewhere between 40 and 50 miles an hour that you can go.
And not get the ticket.
That does not mean drive 30 in the 40 zone.
And the more often the way that it works is that you got people doing 50.
And then they get somewhere near the cameras.
They slam on their brakes.
Right.
Do somewhere between 25 and 35.
Right.
Through the little zone.
And it's just such a pain in the butt.
Yeah.
I mean, if I was a cop myself, I was a cop.
I would actually go on the other side of these speeding cameras and just wait for people to speed back up.
Right.
Because that's exactly what happens.
Well, they should have one.
One that's sitting there ticketing the people that are driving too slow.
Right.
You're going 25 in a 40.
Yeah.
It's dangerous.
Right.
You're making people slam on their brakes.
Right.
Right.
For no reason.
Right.
Right.
It's just lame.
Stupid traffic.
You know, you think in this day and age there would be some sort of technology out there
that, you know, we could all keep at the same speed.
We should take a hit, though.
Yeah.
Pima County, you know, I recently just moved way out to the east side.
Way out in the boondocks.
So I am not in the city limits any longer.
Right.
And there was a traffic camera over there on Tank of Verde near Houghton.
Mm-hmm.
Right?
It's gone now.
Really?
Gone.
Like the city removed or somebody else removed it?
The county removed it.
Oh, okay.
Because people were angry about it.
Really?
They were saying, we don't want this camera here.
Get rid of it.
So the community got together and got rid of it.
So let's take a clue from the county here, from the people, residents of that neighborhood,
and I think that we should all just complain until they get rid of the cameras because
it's so dumb.
Or we could just hire some vigilantes and just go ahead and remove them ourselves.
Obviously, it's ticketing people for doing six miles an hour at a green light as soon
as you're the first one out of the gate.
Right, right.
Ah, so lame.
Are you done with your soapbox, right?
Yeah, I'm done with my soapbox, right?
All right, so tell me how I can rent out my bathroom.
Well, apparently, if you have an extra bathroom and you want to rent it out because you don't
know what to do with that space, or you want somebody else that you don't know to mess
up your bathroom because your teenagers aren't doing enough for you, there is a new app on
your smartphones that you can rent out your bathroom.
Now, apparently, I can't see how this has been a big issue in a smaller town like Tucson,
but maybe in New York City this might be important.
You know, maybe there's not enough bathrooms for too many people.
So you can get on this app and put your bathroom up for rent and with a fee, and people will
as long as you're home that you can let them in.
What kind of fee are we talking about?
Well, you can set your own fee.
Okay.
So whatever you want it to be.
You want it to be $10?
It can be $10.
You want it to be $200?
If you're willing to pay it, so be it.
You've got to have a really nice bathroom for $200.
A little boudet.
But, you know, I mean, it's this app.
I haven't checked it out.
But it's great.
It's called CLOO.
So CLOO, I'm assuming is how it's pronounced.
I'm not in.
Why would you?
I'm not in.
First of all, I don't think that I could walk into somebody's place and be like, oh, yeah,
I saw your bathroom online.
Yeah.
I'm here to wreck it.
Yeah.
You know what?
We should just hire Howard to go around to everybody's bathrooms and just wreck them.
I just can't do it.
I have a hard time.
I'm even when I go over to people's houses, like, you know, get invited over to a party
or something.
I can't use their bathroom.
Right.
It's just like, yeah, I'll wait till I get home.
It's totally cool.
I don't get it.
Well, maybe as a growing friend.
Who knows?
This is one of those things with technology.
Right.
It's gone too far.
It's a crappy idea.
Piss poor.
It's just not good.
You're done with your puns.
If you'd like to be part of the show, 751-1041, how much would you rent out your bathroom
for?
Just out of curiosity.

I don't know.
One billion dollars.
Wouldn't it be weird that you're just sitting there, the doorbell rings, and you're like,
oh, yeah, I forgot.
Dude's got to come over and use the bathroom.
What's the deal?
Well, it's just like that story we did a few months back about turning sewage stuff into
hamburgers.
I mean, this is just going too far.
Technology has gone way too far.
So I think we need to nip it in the butt.
No pun intended.
I think that's in the bud.
Whatever.
That's good.
You use nippers.
Yeah, well.
On your rosebud.
On your rosebud.
On your rosebud.


Oh, man.
That's just, this is wrong.
It's wrong in every sense of the word.
All right.
All right.
All right.
So we covered the Marty McFly shoes.
We did.
We covered the hacking of the cars.
Covered and renting out your bathroom.
Renting out your bathrooms.
Oh, God.
What about the invisibility shield for tanks?
I have not heard of this.
What is this?
Apparently.
Ah!
I forgot to turn off my phone.
Oh, good job.
That's terrible.
That's me calling up.
See, that is radio foul, right?
Right there.
So what is an invisibility shield?
What is this?
Apparently, there's a way that you can turn your tank into an invisible tank.
I've always wanted to turn my tank into an invisible tank.
You have a tank?
I do.
Oh, that's awesome.
Sorry.
It makes them look like cows.
It makes them look like cows?
That's a big cow.
Gosh.
I'm going to have to, we're going to post that on the website, but it's an interesting
story.
You've got to go into detail here a little bit.
I'm on the hook.
I'm on the hook now.
You've got to tell me.
We'll cover that in a minute, but we've got a break coming up here, so I need to mention
the classes.
So if you want to be part of the classes this evening, from three to five, we're doing
an introduction to Windows 7.
Nice.
It will be at the classroom location.
What will I learn?
You will learn what's new in Windows 7.
If you're migrating from Windows XP, which is what most of the people that are showing
up are for, or they recently got a copy of Windows 7 and they just really don't know
what to do with it.
Don't use it as a coaster.
It's funny.
I talked to somebody this morning, and I said, so what do you want to learn?
What are you hoping to get out of this class?
What are you hoping to get out of it?
That's my standard question to everybody.
When they walk in, what do you want to learn today?
So I can at least hit exactly what they want to learn during the class.
Tailor the class to your needs.
Right.
And he goes, well, I got this Windows 7 machine because my old one died, and I really would
like some instruction on it, but I've just been using it in the meantime because what
else can I do?
Right.
And that's exactly what you should be doing.
Use it because you'll find out that it's not as different as you think it is.
Yeah.
It is.
It just looks more aesthetics than anything.
Right.
It's much like cars.
Right.
Right.
You know, as far as, you know, you go from one car to another.
They still drive the same.
It's still the basic mechanics are the same as far as, you know, you get in, you push
the accelerator, you turn the wheel, et cetera.
So that's where I messed up when I got my new car.
I forgot about where the accelerator was.
I always forget where the brake pedal is.
That's my problem.
Yeah, I know.
Wait, I'm supposed to stop?
If I wanted to stop, I wouldn't have gotten in the car.
That's all I'm saying.
All right.
So let's go and take a break, Ross.
Let's do it.
Let's do our thing here.
This is the Computer Guru.
So when we come back, we'll tell you how to turn your tank into a cow if you happen to
have one.
We'll talk about the Street View camera being graffitied and Apple being a little, they're
being a little punk about the Galaxy Tab.
It's just, it's dumb.
Oh, and by the way, they're finally getting flash.
Yeah.
This is the Computer Guru Show.
We'll be right back.
This is the Computer Guru.
Get any problem for any system solved by calling 751-1041.
The Computer Guru is on.
1041 The Truth.
This is on Snooze.
So if you want to make your tank invisible.
Yes, I'm listening.
The way that this works is it only really shields you from thermal view.
So infrared.
Infrared.
Right.
Nitrogen goggles.
Nitrogen goggles and such.
And it's pretty nifty.
Really?
It uses a series of hexagon tiles.
Okay.
That cover the entire tank.
Right.
And they.
Not spaceship tiles, so they don't fall off.
They might fall off.
I don't know.
But that's just wrong.
What?
They always fall off.
The problem is.
The problem is they're using 30-year-old technology in those old spaceships still?
You know what?
We're not going to go there.
You're going to get me all distracted.
I'm going to go on a rant.
Oh, sorry.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
You're an invisible tank.
Let's go.
The invisible tank has these hexagon tiles on them that are able to change temperature rapidly.
Okay.
To match the surrounding area.
Right.
There's a camera on there that sweeps the area and says, oh, the stuff that's on the
other side of me.
Is this temperature.
Is this temperature.
And then it matches it so that it makes it invisible.
That is actually really cool.
Or it can mask itself.
Or it can draw with those pixels.
Right.
Right.
With each tile can change a different temperature slightly.
And you can make it look like.
Like a car.
Yeah.
I just saw that video.
I mean, it's a really cool video.
So, I mean, you see it.
And you see the tank sitting there.
And then it turns on these tiles.
Right.
The tank.
The silhouette disappears.
And then the car silhouette shows up.
Yep.
And so now it just looks like a car.
I mean, that's really cool.
Now, I'm thinking if I'm a tank operator.
Right.
If I see a car, I'm blowing it up anyways.
Right.
But.
What's the car doing out here where that tank's supposed to be?
Yeah.
Right.
Wait a minute.
Something's not right here.
I don't know why you'd want to make it disguised as anything other than not there.
There.
Right.
So.
You can make it look like a camel or a cow or.
Yeah, but why?
Because, you know.
Because you want.
Well, yeah, that's true.
I'm thinking that those guys in the tank are going to shoot anything that's out there.
Right.
It's a cow out there.
They're like hamburgers.
Well, when I drive my tank.
I do have a tank.
Okay.
Roll the tanks.
It's a really cool game, I'm going to tell you.
Anyways, when I drive my tank, I just shoot whatever moves.
Right.
See?
See?
That's why I'm saying.
You just want to be invisible completely.
Right.
At least it can do that.
Technology is interesting.
It can do cool advertisement.
They were advertising their own name on the side.
That was cool.
You can put on their sponsor by Goodyear.
Something like that.
Just think invisible by Goodyear.
Raytheon tank.
Oh.
So, some news in Apple.
What?
All right.
Yeah, well, Apple's kind of being a jerk.
Apple's being a jerk?
Yeah.
Okay.
All right, so.
Wait, wait, wait.
Hold on.
Jobs is gone and they're still being jerks?
Yeah.
No.
Well, you get to say that again here in a minute when you say jobs is gone and this.
Oh, all right.
But.
So, they've decided that they're trying to ban the Galaxy Tab 10-inch, the 10-inch Galaxy
Tab from sale in Europe.
Okay.
Right?
Because it too closely resembles the iPad.
Oh, man.
I thought we were done with this.
Yeah.
Well, remember, we talked about this a few weeks ago where they were saying, you know,
Samsung's response was, well, there was a tablet in the Space Odyssey movie.
Yeah.
You know, how did you get the baton for it?
And that was like 20 years ago, 30 years ago.
So.
So, apparently, there was a judge in Europe that said you can't ban it in Europe as a whole.
Right.
Right.
You can ban it in individual countries.
So, they got Germany to ban it.
Really?
Yeah.
They're trying to ban it in Japan.
Ugh.
And the thing is, is that it's a tablet.
So, this is how Apple does it, though.
Apple, they don't try to go ahead and do direct competition with people.
They just go ahead and sue people and get them out of business.
Well, I mean, I understand that you want to protect the intellectual property rights and
the et cetera, et cetera.
But.
But it's a tablet.
Yeah.
I mean, it's like.
I mean, how much difference can you have in a tablet?
I mean, really, how different can you make it?
Well, it's like saying the makers of my car are the Chevy.
Well, my Chevy car should sue the makers of the Scion.
Because, you know, they both have four wheels.
And doors.
And a hatch.
And a hatch.
Yeah.
And door locks.
I mean, that doesn't make sense to me.
It's.
You can look at the Galaxy Tab and you can plainly see that it's not an iPad.
You can tell it's not an iPad.
Right.
And you can use it and find out.
Yeah.
It's Flash.
You know, it has other things that the iPad doesn't have.
Yes.
I mean, I think that's dumb.
Really.
That to go out there and sue them over that.
It's.
Whatever.
I mean, I understand that they.
It is their intellectual.
They're short on cash over there at Apple.
Yeah.
They're short on cash.
They only have $86 billion in liquid assets.
But, you know, you got to keep.
Well, you got to watch the bottom line.
They have more money than the government.
Well, actually, last time I heard, I had more money than the government.
All right.
So, speaking of Flash.
Yes, Flash.
All right.
Say it again.
Flash.
Flash.
Steve Jobs is gone.
Oh, yeah.
So, now that Flash.
You know, Steve Jobs is gone.
Now, Apple's getting Flash.
Yes.
All of the iOS devices are getting Flash now.
Wow.
So, all it took was Jobs to leave.
Yes.
iOS 5, when it comes out, will have Flash built in, which will be nice.
So, you can actually, like, use the thing.
I'll believe it when I see it.
Because, you know, they talked about this for iOS 4.
It was rumored for iOS 4 and iOS 3.
I mean, I'll believe what I see.
Steve Jobs is still there.
Yeah, I know.
But, still.
He still has a big foothold in the company.
He can still just nix it if he wanted to.
Oh, come on.
Come on.
It's Jobs.
He created that company.
And over again.
Twice.
That's right.
So, it'll be nice to actually have some Flash compatibility with your iOS device.
Yeah, it would be pretty cool, I guess.
Yeah.
Because, right now, you know, I spend a lot of time going, I can't do that.
It's Flash.
Well, that's one of the biggest things that, you know, I have a lot of customers that we
build websites for.
By the way, we build websites.
And, the biggest hindrance that I don't, the reason I don't pitch a lot of Flash websites
for my customers is you can't access them on iPads or iPhones.
You can on Droids, but not iPads.
So, that's the biggest reason why I haven't pitched that many.
But, I guess, now, I don't have that excuse anymore.
Yeah, now, you'll be able to pitch the right type of website.
Yeah, now, I have to think of another excuse.
Yes.
Flash is a pain in the butt.
That's the only excuse.
No, no.
Actually, I'm finishing up this Flash website right now.
It is going to be absolutely gorgeous.
I can't wait to make it live.
It should be live this week.
And, then, next week, I'll be able to tell you guys about it and tell you the website
so you can look at it and praise how beautiful it is and tell me how awesome I am.
I am awesome.
I am.
I am.
This website is amazing.
I amazed myself.
Really?
Well, that's not hard to do.
I have extremely low standards.
Oh, look.
My shoes are tied.
That's amazing.
I know.
I have extremely low standards.
All right.
So, are you thinking about a new phone?
I am thinking about a new phone.
I mean, because the Droid Bionic is out.
Yes.
Now, the Droid Bionic, first of all, it's been hyped to no end.
Yes.
It has.
It has been like a little...
Nine months of their saying, hey, this awesome phone is going to come out.
Right.
And, they've been playing the hype game.
Just like...
Like Apple.
They put one out in the wild and let it sneak out a little bit and they bring it back.
Yeah.
That's another rant.
Just going off on all kinds of tangents today about how companies are making me angry.
Angry.
Angry.
Yes.
I'm going to turn green and need a new shirt.
But, you know, the new phone is out.
Here's my problem with it.
Okay.
All right.
It's got great features.
All right.
And, that's your problem with it?
Hold on.
I'm getting there.
I have to build up to this.
Oh.
This is radio.
All right.
So...
So, there's...
It's got a great processor.
Lots of memory.
It's very fast.
Bigger screen.
It is beautiful.
Not to mention the fact that it's got a docking station that turns it into a laptop.
I love that.
It's got full HDMI compatibility.
Nice.
You can hook it up to a nice TV or a monitor.
Excellent.
It's got all kinds of really nifty features.
Okay.
Here's my problem.
It's $300.
That's $300 with the two-year discount.
So, with the Droid X?
No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no.
No.
No, it was...
No, it was...
It was $300, dude.
I promise you it was.
So, it's too expensive, in my opinion.
All right.
At least for me right now.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I don't have any money.
So, and then if you want the laptop adapter, it's an extra $200.
You know, I think Verizon, what Verizon should do, our local Verizon stores, they should
hook us up so we can talk about their phone.
Yeah.
And they'll praise it in all its glory and all its awesomeness.
Okay.
Well, we're doing other things that will be totally ignored.
You know, you've got...
You've got the docking station, it's an extra $200.
The HDMI station, another $100.

And there's a broad-spectrum Wi-Fi adapter for it, which will allow you to wirelessly
tether to a monitor or...
Really?
Yeah.
Oh, that is awesome.
Which would be interesting.
But, you know, it's...
I don't know that it's really...
And it's 4G, so that also helps.
The LTE, yeah.
But I don't know that it's really going to...
People are going to gravitate to it right now in...
On Macs.
On Macs, right?
Because all you're looking at is, you know, an additional...
You're adding 4G to a Droid X, you know?
And so I don't know that how much that's really going to work with the public.
You think it's just a Droid X?
I mean, it's a faster processor, all these other cool features.
I get it.
But, you know, like the Droid X2 is the same processor.
Yeah, well.
Right?
That thing bombed.
Well, and it wasn't different enough.
That's what I'm thinking is going on here, is that it's not different enough to make it so that it's going to be...
You know, something everybody runs to get.
Do we know what OS it's going to have in Gingerbread?
Yeah, it comes with the 2.3.4.
Okay.
So, I mean, it's got the newest operating system on it.
Right.
It's a good phone from everything I see spec-wise, but I don't know that it really is going to make a big enough impact to really get out there.
But speaking of big impacts, you know, you've got T-Mobile, or...
No, I'm sorry, not T-Mobile, Sprint, that is preparing for a major phone release next month.
So, it's anticipated that they're going to be getting that.
Yeah.












An iPhone.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, for Sprint here shortly.
So, I mean, yeah, I'm not into that.
Sprint getting an iPhone?
No, I'm not into it at all.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
I mean, come on, if I wanted a bad phone service, I'd stick with AT&T.
Sorry, that was bad.
You've got the nationwide plan, which is nationwide, except for where I'm standing.
Except for my house.
That's right.
Or the every other word plan, which is my favorite one.
That's the one T-Mobile.
It was terrible.
It is terrible.
I moved to Verizon.
You're such a sad, sad boy.
You know what?
I'm done with you.
Yeah.
All right, so here's what's going to happen.
When we come back after the next hour, you know, into the next hour here,
we're going to talk about more things to make your life better, technology-wise,
and also, you need to remember, tomorrow, September 11th, it's the 10-year anniversary,
so make sure that you're doing something to be a better person and to make us a better country.
This is Computer Guru Show.
We'll be right back after the news.
We'll be right back.